Have you ever played hooky at work? It has happened to all f us. You wake up and it is a beautiful day, and the last you want is going to work. Now you have to think of an excuse to tell you boss and hope he or she accepts your excuse.
A study by the mutual healthcare provider Benenden Health found revealed some some terrible excuses for not turning up to work. The results from the study revealed that six out of ten bosses do not believe excuses given by their employees.
In CareerBuilder’s annual survey, 29 percent of workers admitted to playing hooky this year, citing errands and plans with family or friends among their top reasons for calling in sick. But some employees like to get more creative.
Before calling in sick you should think twice about what you say. Many managers will search social media after receiving your call and hearing your excuse and to see if your are healthy enough to post updates. Employers are being forced to monitor employee sick leave and absenteeism via social media, questioning the reasons for absence, or even going as far as requesting a doctors note.
High levels of sickness absence can have a huge negative impact on businesses – both from a financial perspective and on the effect it has on staff who bear the extra workload. The biggest effects of sickness were the demotivation caused to those employees who have to take on the work of the absent employees.
Here are a few excuses; some smart some not, that people use to avoid going to work:
- I just put a casserole in the oven.
- My plastic surgery needs some tweaking to get it just right.
- My feet and legs fell asleep when I was sitting in the bathroom, and when I stood up I broke my ankle.
- I was gambling at the casino all weekend and still have money left. I need to stay to win it back.
- I open the fridge and it fell on me.
- I’m stuck in the blood pressure machine at the grocery store.
- I got lucky last night and don’t know where I am this morning.
- I put my uniform in the microwave to dry and it caught fire.
- I accidentally got on a plane.
- A can of baked beans landed on my big toe
- I was swimming too fast and smacked my head on the poolside
- I’ve been bitten by an insect
- My 12 year old daughter stole my car and you had no other to get to work.
- My car handbrake broke and it rolled down the hill into a lamppost.
- My dog has had a big fright and I don’t want to leave him.
- My hamster died.
- I’ve injured myself during sex.
- I slipped on a coin.
- My child stuck a mint up his nose and had to go to the ER to remove it.
- I’ve had a sleepless night.
- My mum has died (this was the second time the person used this excuse).
- I am hallucinating.
- I am stuck in my house because the door’s broken.
- My new girlfriend bit me in a delicate place.
- I burned my hand on the toaster.
- The dog ate my shoes.
- My fish is sick.
- I swallowed white spirit.
- My toe is trapped in the bath tap.
- I drank too much and fell asleep on someone’s floor – I don’t know where I am.
- My trousers split on the way to work.
- I’m using a new contact lens solution and my eyes are watering.
- I have a blocked nose.
- I’ve had a hair dye disaster.
- I’ve got a sore finger .
When you arrive at a new company there are things you can look out for. People are either making eye contact or saying “Hello!” to one another or racing by without acknowledging that there is another person around them.
Here are some pointers about what a great place to work look like!
- A Human Workplace is a workplace where the energy is fast moving and positive.
- A Human Workplace has very few yardsticks imposed from on high.
- In a Human Workplace there are ten or twenty ways for good ideas to bubble up, down and sideways
- There is no Chief Human Workplace Officer to enforce the culture, because there is nothing to enforce. Trust is the antidote, and that means everybody has to soften.
- The goal in a Human Workplace is to fulfill the organization’s mission, not to create bureaucracy and preserve it against all reason.
- In a Human Workplace Your manager is a coach. There is a minimum of red tape, and there is as much conversation about good (= human) process as about any other business topic.
- Human Workplace leaders sound like fallible human beings. Human Workplaces are places where people act like human beings.
- Human Workplaces are more fun, more productive, more profitable, more sustainable and healthier than other organizations. They get to their goals faster and have more fun doing it. They delight their customers and put their investors in a swoon. Let the fear go and trust the brilliant people you hire.
You can have a Human Workplace. It is not difficult and it does not cost anything. You only have to let go of the idea that managers know more than employees do. You have to let go of the idea that rules make a place more efficient. You have to trust yourself enough to trust the people you hire.
The Council of Education Ministers affirms that there is an urgent need to scrutinize precisely how human resource management is carried out in provincial education departments to improve accountability among principals and schools.
During a special meeting organised last week, which was attended by Minister of Basic Education Angie Motshekga, the council have agreed to the fact that there was an immediate need to scrutinize precisely how human resource management is carried out in provincial education departments to make certain that the curriculum is adequately covered to boost and improve the quality of education.
At the same time, it was agreed that the PERSAL system will be cleaned up to verify exactly who was employed by the Department of Basic Education, where these individuals are located and exactly what subjects they provide. This certainly will at the same time enhance initiatives to improve record keeping.
The council additionally affirmed its support of improved teacher accountability by way of teacher attendance, learner attendance, and class period control registers, in conjunction with continuous monitoring to be able to assist schools in the use of these accountability instruments.
Relating to the issue of human resources, the council concluded that provincial heads of department need to carry out an audit of learner and teacher numbers and finalise teacher profiles for departments in order to effectively make use of teachers within the system.
The council noted the Integrated School Health Programme, whose primary objective is health screening. The programme is going to be multi-departmental and rolled out in every school in order to do away with major health barriers to learning. The progressive implementation of the programme is going to be carried out in collaboration with the Department of Health, Social Development and National Treasury, the council mentioned.