Tag Archives: absenteeism

The worst excuses for missing work

Playinh hooky
Have you ever played hooky at work? It has happened to all f us. You wake up and it is a beautiful day, and the last you want is going to work. Now you have to think of an excuse to tell you boss and hope he or she accepts your excuse.

A study by the mutual healthcare provider Benenden Health found revealed some some terrible excuses for not turning up to work. The results from the study revealed that six out of ten bosses do not believe excuses given by their employees.

In CareerBuilder’s annual survey, 29 percent of workers admitted to playing hooky this year, citing errands and plans with family or friends among their top reasons for calling in sick. But some employees like to get more creative.

Before calling in sick you should think twice about what you say. Many managers will search social media after receiving your call and hearing your excuse and to see if your are healthy enough to post updates. Employers are being forced to monitor employee sick leave and absenteeism via social media, questioning the reasons for absence, or even going as far as requesting a doctors note.

High levels of sickness absence can have a huge negative impact on businesses – both from a financial perspective and on the effect it has on staff who bear the extra workload. The biggest effects of sickness were the demotivation caused to those  employees who have to take on the work of the absent employees.

Here are a few excuses; some smart some not, that people use to avoid going to work:

  • I just put a casserole in the oven.
  • My plastic surgery needs some tweaking to get it just right.
  • My feet and legs fell asleep when I was sitting in the bathroom, and when I stood up I broke my ankle.
  • I was gambling at the casino all weekend and still have money left. I need to stay to win it back.
  • I open the fridge and it fell on me.
  • I’m stuck in the blood pressure machine at the grocery store.
  • I got lucky last night and don’t know where I am this morning.
  • I put my uniform in the microwave to dry and it caught fire.
  • I accidentally got on a plane.
  • A can of baked beans landed on my big toe
  • I was swimming too fast and smacked my head on the poolside
  • I’ve been bitten by an insect
  • My 12 year old daughter stole my car and you had no other to get to work.
  • My car handbrake broke and it rolled down the hill into a lamppost.
  • My dog has had a big fright and I don’t want to leave him.
  • My hamster died.
  • I’ve injured myself during sex.
  • I slipped on a coin.
  • My child stuck a mint up his nose and had to go to the ER to remove it.
  • I’ve had a sleepless night.
  • My mum has died (this was the second time the person used this excuse).
  • I am hallucinating.
  • I am stuck in my house because the door’s broken.
  • My new girlfriend bit me in a delicate place.
  • I burned my hand on the toaster.
  • The dog ate my shoes.
  • My fish is sick.
  • I swallowed white spirit.
  • My toe is trapped in the bath tap.
  • I drank too much and fell asleep on someone’s floor – I don’t know where I am.
  • My trousers split on the way to work.
  • I’m using a new contact lens solution and my eyes are watering.
  • I have a blocked nose.
  • I’ve had a hair dye disaster.
  • I’ve got a sore finger .

New policy changes to address the 40% absenteeism at FET colleges

Gwebinkundla Qonde, the higher education and training director-general
Gwebinkundla Qonde, the higher education and training director-general.


In order to deal with lack of students punctuality and attendance at further education and training colleges (FET), the Department of Higher Education and Training is promulgating a new policy to improve the outcomes of colleges.

There is a current perception that FET colleges are merely dismal, glorified high school, and the department of education is now set new ground rules to improve upon the quality of training and education provided by FET colleges.

Over the past few hers, the department of education has implemented a number of programs to convert FET colleges into institutions of choice in order to combat the lack of scarce skills in the country. Interventions such the appointment of chartered accountants as financial directors and numerous short-term interventions to assist weak colleges. Also students who could not afford to pay for eduction have been provided with free eduction.

, stated that all policy changes will be coming into effect in 2014 in order to address the dismal attendance and functionality of students. Currently,  40% of all students either do not bother to attend class or are late for their classes.

The new policy change’s main objective is to further improve the FET sector and is a warning to those students who do not attend or are late for classes with the prospect of being denied the right to take their exams and any financial support.

“The department, therefore, expects public FET colleges to set and enforce this policy, and our students to comply with high levels of attendance and punctuality to improve their chances for success and prepare them for the professional culture of the workplace.,” Gwebinkundla Qonde stated in a media briefing.

Since 2010, student enrollment has risen over 90% from 345,566 to 657,690 last year. During the same period, government funding of FET colleges has risen from R3.9bn to R5.6bn this year.

The new policy changes announced by Gwebinkundla Qonde goes hand in hand with the turnaround strategy announced last by the Minister of Higher Education and Training Blade Nzimande for FET colleges. The main emphasis of the turnaround strategy was for effective curriculum development, professional development of academic staff, partnerships and linkages as well as student support services.

The policy changes will permit students who have an attendance of at least 80% for each subject to write exams, and colleges will be required to verify and provide attendance information to the Department of Higher Education and Training. The verification and attendance registry will have to be provided prior to the handing out of examination entry permits to students at the start of an examination session. At the same time, students who receive bursaries for tuition, travel and accommodation will only be paid if they have a minimum of 80% attendance record.

In the case that a student is sick on a regular basis for a particular course, the lecturer will have the right to call in the student to review the status of the students, and if necessary stop all cash disbursements.

The new policy changes have been welcomes across the political spectrum with many politicians stating that these changes should have come in effect years ago and that it is a pity that the government has to resort to these types of actions. Once would expect students to take responsibility for their own education and self-discipline.